The Story of a Portrait. (The Importance of Wedding Photography)

Everyone who knows me, knows how close I was to my Nani. She was my mother! Well, mother is my mother, but her mother was more of a mother to me than my mother could or would ever be. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mother, but I loved my nani much more…

She was born in Shekupura, Punjab (now in Pakistan) in 1928 in an affluent Sikh family. Got married in March, 1947 to the most handsome man in the world. Not that she wasn’t a looker herself.

Late Sardarni Raminder Kaur Nakai AKA ‘BIJI’ AKA ‘Nani’

The Story of a Portrait!

Out of all the stories I heard from my nani all my growing years; of her life growing up, of her siblings, of the trauma and tragedies of the partition, one story kept getting repeated every now and then. It was the story of a Portrait.

A few days into the wedding, the newly wed couple happened to visit Lahore and while walking around in the bazaar, my grandfather happened to spot a Studio. He asked my nani if she wanted to get a picture taken. The shy, awkward 19 year old immediately refused on the pretext of a ‘crumpled duppata’ and ‘mud covered shoes’. He insisted and my nani gave in to his insistence and went and got themselves a ‘Portrait’.

Over the years, as life happened, the picture was nowhere to be found, but in my nani’s stories.

Come 1st March 2001, she was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer and was given 3 months. She passed away on the 28th of June 2001 and with her went the only person who I truly and unconditionally loved and who in return loved me like none ever can.

Few months later, I happened to visit my massi in Chandigarh. We were all sitting and remembering ‘Biji’ and suddenly out of nowhere, my massi handed over a beautiful portrait to me that clearly had seen years. I asked who the couple in that photograph was and my massi told me it was my Nana - Nani.

The Portrait

It was the same portrait that Nani kept talking about. I saw those muddy shoes and the crumpled dupatta but I didn’t, at first, see my Nani in that picture. I saw a shy and ravishing young girl with a man who looked nothing less than a greek god. It took me a while to realise that my nani didn’t always have wrinkles and grey hair, she was a young person once. I don’t think I have cried as much as I cried that day.

I got to see how my nani looked as a young girl, thanks to that Studio in the Bazaars of Lahore. Obviously no one today knows where that studio is or who that photographer was but he continues to live in this portrait. No one can ever take away his presence from it and thats the most beautiful thing about photography. You may live long or you may not. But you pictures will outlive you…..well, if done right that is… ;)

So my point is…We, the Wedding Photographers are NOT IMPORTANT!

What’s important is what we do and how much we are able to live up to the responsibility that our clients bestow upon us by hiring us to document their wedding.

We are the reason, for our couples grand or great grand kids to know how their Nana - Nani or Dada - Dadi looked when they were young. Think about it..isn’t that the a immensly satisfying feeling?

What we, as Wedding Photographers, have to realise and constantly tell ourselves is that, we have the power to create history and family heirloom for our clients.

Ok Hold On….Lets go back to that picture for a moment.

Does this picture mean the world and more to me, YES!

Does it matter, if its a “Candid shot” or a “Traditional photograph”……..HELL NO!!

We are ‘Wedding Photographers’, our Job demands us to shoot everything that happens at a wedding in our own unique way. I don’t get this ‘Candid Photographer’ and ‘Traditional Photographer” divide. I don’t see how one is more important than the other.

As a Wedding Photographer, we need to capture ‘Moments’, we need to take ‘Portraits’, we need to take ‘Behind the Scenes, we need to take ‘Group Pictures’ and everything else there may be. I don’t understand why some photographers consider it beneath them to take group pictures. I love taking group pictures, for one its a wonderful way of getting to know the guests and in return becoming a part of the celebrations.

I have been doing this for more than half a decade now and I truly feel I was born to do this. There is nothing that gives me more happiness and there is nothing else I would rather do.

I see a lot of young kids wanting to get into this thinking its ‘easy money’,….well, ask anyone who has been doing this for a while and they will tell you otherwise. Its for sure an easy to enter industry but you can only survive if you have an undying love for humanity, never ending fire to acquire knowledge of the art and craft of photography, a desire to continuously reinvent oneself, reasonable marketing acumen and above all, colossal heaps of patience.

By no means am I trying to preach, all I am trying to say is that this is a job that deserves to be done from the heart. Yes, money is important, charge as much as you can but lets not forget our responsibility.

This seasons, lets all give each our clients at least one photograph their grandkids will cherish all their lives.

Happy Shooting!

Wedding photography- The way I see it

I often get asked, Why Weddings? Let me try and address that today-

From the very beginning I have craved the sense of togetherness and belonging that are intertwined within familial bliss. I reckon it's because I didn't too much of this “Family Life” growing up, but that's a story for another day.

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Too often, routine permits us to take for granted the ones we share our lives with. Marking the more important events of our lives with ceremonies is an anthropological need, it is what ties us with the fabric of humanity. 

It is usually easier for people to express their love at milestone events, such as weddings. They serve as an outlet for emotions that would otherwise remain unexpressed. 

It is in these moments you understand the unsaid, unconditional love of your otherwise hug-dodging Chachu. 

The spectrum of tradition and ceremonies pan across the country, whether it is a ‘Choorha’ ceremony of a Punjabi wedding or the ‘Haldi’ Ceremony of a Jain one. Rituals and traditions are tokens that give us a quantifiable and tangible sense of togetherness

Moments like these are fleeting, where our memories fade, photographs bridge the gaps. Photography, to me, is the art of capturing the most essential moments of life, the moments that you would otherwise keep in your memory. 

Photos are permanent, so I capture snippets of life that remind you of how you felt, versus how you looked. I am less interested in the crispness of your sherwani or the can-can in your lehnga, you glow on your big day without even realizing it.

As our means of communication become more visual, it is imperative that we create images of substance. These images ought to be timeless and should have the ability to take you back to that very moment even after decades. 

When I photograph, I am not a voyeur peeping from the outside in, I am a well wisher telling the story of your love from the inside out.

I hope to show you the subtle exchanges of your feels. 

Not everyone will notice the goose bumps on your skin when you see your bride as your wife for the first time or the tear you father wiped away when you were not looking. 

When I am at a wedding and I witness the Vidai of the bride, I am moved by the sameness of emotions that occurs when it’s time for the father’s little girl to begin a new chapter .

There are many many iterations of the same ritual, every family plays it out differently, but it takes moments like these to put life into perspective. At the end of the day, rights of passages like these are the common thread of the human experience. It is these threads that draw me most.

I’m an emotional guy you see, particularly in awe of shaadis. I’m on a constant look out to see the finer displays of emotions.

The subtle gesture of romance between the to be wed couple, the bittersweet tears of the sister of the bride when she walks away, the hopeful eyes of the mother–in-law when she gains a daughter. 

The idea is not to document every moment of your big day, the idea is to preserve the most important ones. The most important ones are ones that you cannot see only feel, the most precious images are the ones that project that feeling.